The World Will Never Do

embrace the fate of that dark hour,
the moon is down,
i am a moon drop that reason the illusion,
in the affliction of these strange screams

brains were out on their crowns,
the head,
the very fountain of your blood,
his skin laced and his gash'd stabs,
malice performed too terrible for the ear

a torture of mind to say how much is done,
to believe the lie last night,
we hold our tongues,
you know your eyes are made fools

the sun 'gins his reflection,
your cheeks blanch'd with fear,
you must leave,
be innocent of the knowledge,
look into seeds of time,
we'll hear again the cheer.

Things Fall Apart: Monologue

In my monologue I am Ojiugo, Okonkwo's third and youngest wife, talking to Ekwefi, who is one of Okonkwo's other wife. I typed it up on a "memo pad" on my phone. I had it with me everywhere I went to practice. Read it at the dinner table, on the skytrain, in bed and other places... But maybe an actual memo pad handwritten would've been better? I couldn't really nail it in class, but oh well! lesson learned for my next monologue.. which hopefully won't be anytime soon :D. 

 (blue-highlighted cursor is where to continue)

What does it mean to be a hero?

When only having read three chapters of Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe, it was an indistinctive decision whether Okonkwo was a hero. At first, he had traits that make him a hero; he had people respecting him and looking up to him since he won a great wrestling match. Therefore he brought pride to his tribe. Even though he was a leader and he was admired by other tribesmen, he was a very insecure and cowardly person.
He would beat his wives and his children, at times, for irrational reasons. Heros aren't suppose to harm others. Instead they are to help them; which he does do, since he is supporting his family with his farm. He was insecure in many ways. When it came down to deciding whether to kill Ikemefuna or not, he didn't want to. But he did so anyways because he didn't want to look 'weak' amongst the tribe.
Okonkwo had a huge fear of others thinking he is weak, which is why he never respected his father, Unoka. Unoka was a man full of debts, but was still a happy man. Another way Okonkwo wasn't a hero, he didn't offer support to his father instead, he just left him to be. Okonkwo was ashamed of his failure.
In the end, after he was exiled, he hung himself to death. He just gave up on life because of the fact he was ashamed of his actions. After reading the novel and looking at Okonkwo's decisions, I don't think he is a hero at all. Heros stay determined and always try to find positivity in life, Okonkwo on the other hand was just a coward.

A Thousand Splendid 'Conflicts'.

In the novel A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini the main conflicts are between Mariam and herlsef as she is trapped in an undesired reality. Mariam is a young girl living in the low class society in Afghanistan. She lives with her mother, Nana, who is unloving towards her and tells her everyday that she is a failure. This doesn't break down Mariam's dreams of a better life just yet because she has two other important people to look upon; Jalil, her father and Mullah Faizullah, an elderly who visits Mariam to teach her how to write, read and pray. Jalil lives in a much different reality than Mariam though, he is rich, has a big house with many other wives and children; a house that he, Mariam and Nana don't share.
The conflict is within Mariam and also with society. In Afghanistan, girls are to stay at home with their mothers and do all the 'chores' instead of going to school. Also, that people like Mariam are to stay in the position they're in because they can't associate themselves with the higher class. It becomes tough for Mariam to ever pursure her dreams of education and to follow in her father's successful footsteps.
When invited by her father to come watch a film at the theatre he owns, Nana pressures Mariam to not go, that she will die if Mariam leaves her. Mariam has long waited for this day so she left anyways, but when she returns she is greatly filled with remorse when she sees that her mother hung herself on a nearby tree. Now, she has lost the one person she has lived with.
Jalil takes her in to his home with love, giving her everything she needs, a lovely bedroom and enough food. The other children that are Mariam's 'brothers and sisters' also welcomes her with warmth, but the other mothers don't apreciate her presence.
Mariam is not accepted in many people's views because of her social status, even if she isn't 'filthy'. She has lost her mother and everything else. Her relationship with her father has seemed to change for the worse and her ambition and curiousity has shattered. This is a huge conflict within such a character to overcome because it is within oneself to break through what everyone else thinks is 'right or wrong' and strive for what she wants in life.
When I think of these conflicts, I immediate thought of the orphans in a book series called "a Series of Unfortunate Events". Although, the stories are not alike at all, the characters are quite similar to each other. The siblings in the Series of Unfortunate Events have lost the ones they have been living with and their house. Ever since, they have been searching for a better life and another relative they can stay with. The characters from both stories are strong and motivated by their dreams.

"WHITE" > everything else.

Post-colonialism: An era or attitude relating to the period after the settlement of one country by another, or very broadly, after the 1960s, when many colonized countries gained their independence. (http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/postcolonialism)

When we take some time to stop and observe the world; people, culture, literature, beliefs, forms of entertainment and studies, we can conclude that a lot of it is influenced by the Europeans. Above is a quick definition of what post-colonialism is, but I believe that post-colonialism is a more intricate ideology, that is discussed and examined by people. Post-colonialism refers to the ways in which the race, culture, ethnicity and human identity of a precedent colonized country are represented in our modern day to day lives, after becoming independent. It also refers to all the things produced through culture influenced by imperialism; European countries were competing against each other to gain the largest control of the world’s land. The natives of the colonized countries referred to groups such as The Oriental or the Westerners were distinguished as different in several ways mostly negative, from the pure European. Thus making them feel inferior to Caucasians, and in more desire to be like them.

In an article online from women’s E-news (http://www.womensenews.org/story/cultural-trendspopular-culture/090212/ads-pressure-hong-kong-women-whiten), there is a strong example of the desire from oriental culture to be more European. In this article it talks about how in Hong Kong ads are put up in places that are seen by millions of people everywhere; ones that show Asian women with very fair skin and light blonde hair. To the public, seeing these ads for lingerie items, skin bleaching, beauty products with these type of “influenced” models, they are mindset to accept that this is what the “perfect” woman is supposed to look like.

I believe that everyone of any descent, any skin and hair color, shape and size is beautiful in their own way. Along with people, beliefs, music, movies, pop culture and literature are also unique and wonderful. This is how it should be; our world needs diversity and the appreciation of every country’s difference in culture. Unfortunately, it’s not a reality for a lot of  people who still take actions to be more “white” which is equivalent to, for them, “beautiful”.

Stop chasing the wrong man!

Girls, enough with the love obsession over actors like Channing Tatum, Shia Laboeuf and Charlie Sheen, they don't have enough masculinities put together to even equal two and a half men. Therefore, you should start drooling over skateboarders! Ms. Mah and I have both met Ryan Sheckler, a professional skateboarder. We both agree that with his sparkly green eyes, luring smile, and amazing abs, he is the ideal boy for every girl. Skateboarders are like skittles because they are both something everyone craves and there's plenty of them. Infact, you can go straight to the local skateshop, find yourself a skater boy, start dating and everything will be what you've dreamt of for a relationship.  99% of workplaces in the world have stated their respect for boys in ripped skinny jeans, v-neck tee shirts, and neon shoes by only hiring, of the female sex, the ones who are girlfriends of skateboarders. So don't tell him he isn't good enough for you, keep him close because he'll become a superstar and girls like Avril Lavigne will snatch him away from you. Therefore, you should marry one as soon as possible to guarantee a happy life. Although, if you choose to marry an average joe you'll live a shameful life, which is something nobody wants. All skateboarders are tremendously talented and have grand impact. Barack Obama even mentioned for himself, during a broadcasted national live speech, that Tony Hawk's groundbreaking tricks have changed the skating industry massively. So what are you waiting for, get out there and flirt with that skater boy!

A True and Genuine Character

I am currently reading " A Thousand Splendid Suns" by Khaled Hosseini for my independent novel study. In this novel the protagonist is named Mariam. A name given to her by her father, Jalil, meaning in persian, "the tuberose...a lovely flower" (p.12). During the first chapters she's describing her childhood, a time where we can learn a lot about oneself. She is a girl who lives with her mother, Nana, in the outskirts of Gul Durman, Afghanistan, but she was born in the nearby province of Herat where her father lives. Every Thursday, she would long for because Jalil would come and spend time with her. Her father is a wealthy man, he owns a cinema; has three wives and nine other children. Mariam knows none of his other children nor his wives, she lived in a small village with Nana. Nana made Mariam's childhood a tough upbringing. Constantly Nana would call her names, tell her she is not good enough and that everything positive is a lie. This doesn't discourage Mariam to still have wonders of the better world, get lost in other people's stories of great feats and discoveries and to long to have an education in a proper school environment; something her mother finds unnecessary. Although she's spending more time with her mom than her dad, Mariam doesn't follow her mom's negativity. She is ambitious, respectful, smart and curious, but she doesn't get carried away or is gullible of all that she hears. Mariam reminds me of another character, Cinderella. They both have a strong love for their fathers, but receive a lot of criticism from the mom. Mariam is like Cinderella because they're strong, loving, ambitious, someone who longs for something better but doesn't complain. They apreciate and accept where they're at, but in a way don't accept because they dream and wonder of greater things. 

An irresistible love that I can bear no more

Waking to your face every morning,
You look lovely taped to my wall,
Lots think I'm creepy,
But on this special day,
To you I'd say:

Roses are red and so is your curly flowing mane,
On this Valentine's Day of 2011,
I sit here lonely in pain,
To be with you would feel like heaven

Oh, how flawless you are,
Kicking up the halfpipe,
Backside rodeo 540,
My glowing flying tomato

Born in the golden state,
It's meant to be that gold is all you win,
Therefore pick me and forget your mates,
Let's take your Lamborghini for a spin

I'm ready to tear down the 2D you,
And trade it in,
Now it's your queue,
Choose me and toss the others in the bin

My parents tell me I'm not too bright,
Longing for such older men with raging heat,
But you make my heart jump a beat,
Inside this feels oh so right,
So won't you be mine, Shaun White?

It's not what happens, it's what you do

Looking back, I used to be frightened and get upset when things didn't turn out the way they're suppose to. Later on though, I found out that the greatest challenge is not the situation itself but how you bear and react to it. It was a long awaited Friday afternoon. I trudged inside the house with my bag hunched over my back. I was ever so glad, until a few minutes after when my parents came into the room. They wore huge smiles. It was obvious what they wanted, but it wasn't fair. After a dreadful week at school and I'm left with this? My little brother Benjamin, was a menace. No one smart would be willing to spend a whole day, let alone one minute with him.

With soft leather cushioning my back, I flipped through the channels on the TV. In the distance, I heard my parents bid goodbye and eventually, the slam of the thick wood door. Tap, tap, tap. I whipped my head around, and starred deep into his beady wide eyes. I knew right then, that this was going to be a long night.

After just one hour, the cookie jar emptied out like it was sucked by a vacuum, colorful dots were sprawled out and purple blobs stained the carpets. I stood there in awe as I gazed upon the wreckage. How could such a little boy tear up a house like a devil? My fists were clenched as I stomped over to his lair where he was happily amused with his good friends Mario and Luigi. After I unleashed my frustration, his stare looked upon me without a blink until his eyes shut. Tears started to trickle down his face, I ran over and held him in my arms, my heart sunk like an anchor. After a round of "you are my sunshine" the drops stopped dripping.

Through the contagious howls, clicking of the buttons and the revving of the engine coming from the game a dreaded sound turned it all silent. Was someone outside? I was the only one who heard it first, Ben was lapping me, but my mind was occupied somewhere else. All of a sudden the doorbell rang and he jumped in excitement. I quickly tugged him back down and whispered to him "No, it's not Mom and Dad". There, I sat trembling. They weren't suppose to be home until eleven thirty, it was only nine, and why would they ring the doorbell? I turned the TV louder in paranoia to oust the sounds from the outdoors.

That plan was quickly defeated, when I overheard a loud bang coming from the back door. Terrified, I instructed Ben to go upstairs and stay there. As i walked over to the door, i listened carefully for the pitter patter skedaddling up the steps to ensure he was doing what I told him to do. It opened with a creak. A gust of wind blew right through me and chilled me to the bone. "Hello?". No response. "Who's there?". More silence.

My toes froze the moment they grazed the patio. As I creeped around the perimetres of the Russell terrain I couldn't help but to regret not grabbing a jacket. At every corner that bent and darkened, my heart thumped loudly like a fast paced pendulum swinging through my chest. I saw nothing, but the ordinary.

Relieved that whatever was making the sound outside has disappeared, I turned the knob to go back inside. At this moment I realised, I didn't lock the door. Taking strides as long as a giraffe's neck I scurried up the stairs and bursted into the room. "Ben?!". There he sat innocently and frightened, and I rushed over to give him a hug. His heart and love warmed up mine, which was just what i needed. For the rest of the night we played calmly.

My parents told me when they came home, that they found us encircled in each other's arms with peacefulness emerging from our faces. After that night, I came to conclusion that it's not Ben's fault or any others' and not even the events that happened, that affects greatly. It's how one deals with the situation and their decisions on what emotions to release. When I acted irrationally about babysitting Ben, it showed through later events; there was more frustration and tension. This is a challenge which sometimes I still have to overpower anger with optimism, or fright with confidence, within myself to bring out the light of day. Due to following my philosophy, I've created a priceless bond with Ben which is something I am greatly apreciative of.